"Two former reality celebrities, Jessie Camacho and Hardy Hill star in this frightening movie that captures what happens when ancient civilization disrupts pop culture. While shooting a reality show based on a treasure hunt, contestants become involved in a terrifying trap and accidentally unleash the ancient and deadly curse of the pirate Red Blood.

The curse of Red Blood rules the island, and the contestants must fight for their survival. The only way to break the chains of the curse is through bloodshed, and Red Blood is determined to secure his freedom…"

- http://www.moviesonline.ca/film2330.htm

This is one of the many films I brought home one weekend to watch for work (Yeah, I have the worst job ever, haha). It was one of three, actually, The Card Player (good), and Ong Bak (excellent, please see it) being the other two.

If you think the above synopsis sounds cheesy, you're absolutely right.

This is not meant to be a funny movie. It wasn't written as a funny movie, wasn't filmed as a funny movie, wasn't publicized as a funny movie. So why was I laughing throughout my entire viewing? It was just that bad. First of all, I had no idea that pirates had fiberglass rowboats. Not kidding. The acting was terribly hilarious, and the T&A was shown without the slightest hint of an excuse.

Halfway into the film I stopped laughing. The movie scared the shit out of me.

Not because it's a horror movie. But because - in it - I saw my possible future as a film maker. I had to shut the movie off part way through. It was ridiculously bad, but I had to stop laughing at it. I felt that if I didn't, I would be doomed, cursed by the very pirate (bad actor) within the film. People would laugh at my films in the same manner, and I would deserve it as well. I would become cursed to make bad movies.














Scared as hell. For reasons Zirilli (director) never intended.


-1/10